My head has felt clogged up for some days now. Mostly on the right frontal and temporal lobe regions but then later on both sides. It hasn't been the anything like a flu and not precisely a headache either, and you haven't wanted to take paracetamol type things for it either so it's persisted and remains to this moment as well.
The influence may naturally be something entirely unrelated, but if certain influences going on astrologically combined with some of the things looked at online as of late are taken into account, it may also simply be that the body cannot cope with what the mind asks of it, which leads to blockages. Leads to the mind not being able to do what it wants to or needs to, because the physical side isn't clean enough.
Even without such influences or views, it's pretty obvious that I haven't eaten how I should in all too long. Last year having cut pretty much everything from the life and featuring the first depression in your life ever, you used certain things to cling to to try and save yourself from it by New Year, needing to buy what you couldn't precisely afford just to try and rescue yourself even a little bit. Then you used that to propel forward until that somehow in March lead to physical changes, or clinging to getting in better physical shape, and slowly by summer getting mostly over depressive states. It still remained as an undercurrent, life being nowhere near fixed or stable and secure by then either, so Midsummer brought another collapse through outer events.
The risk of a recurrence of how last autumn and winter went was a thought present, but there were things to use to distract yourself from where you could have descended without that or those. Something kept you better afloat this time, but the physical side got neglected after August again, once summer started turning over, so to speak.
I used to be able to "call up" golden shields to envelop the body any time in my teens. I used to have dreams where I either levitated or "flew", although there was a great care never to go higher than treetops, for whatever reason, always getting either pulled back or something similar. At some stage the need for the shields dropped and when the feel of a need for such an aid surfaced in more recent years, what could be managed or mustered was tattered or tarnished and blackened in shine, if able to project much at all from the centre, to envelop you mentally. Flying in dreams was also long gone, the best equivalent being the animal-like movement of bounds or leaps taking you several metres along (or slightly off) the ground, the way it goes with something like a feline doing their leaping run.
Whether related or not, a connection to the state of the physical body was made in any case, and since all that or thinking about any or most of that has been dormant until reminded again, there hasn't been any reason for the head to feel clogged up either. Have the mind ask of the body what it cannot deliver and the mind instantly clogs up. There hasn't even been any conscious focus on anything much beyond the mundane, knowing there isn't any level for it like this, but even that seems to have been enough to create a blockage and a clogged head.
But, as said, maybe it's something else entirely and it simply common sense that you suddenly crave fresh vegetables in the wintertime. Unfortunately finances still dictate that you can't have bloody expensive fresh vegetables to the degree you might need them to try and cleanse the system even a little bit, so the head remains clogged for now. You don't take paracetamols because the reminder that you're not what you should be is apparently needed.
Otherwise other dreams remain as easily accessible as ever though, when you give yourself time to sleep. The symptom or disease of the previous years has also been the burn inside not to go to bed while focusing on whatever, because "You can sleep when you're dead". If there was a chance to do 20 hours awake and 12-14 hours asleep, you suspect that your natural rhythm would appreciate that much better than what it has to try and follow through society's rules. As it is, you either don't get more than 6 hours of sleep at most or can't keep up with anything you want to focus on through lack of hours awake per day.
So the ideal would be to eat how you'd need to, sleep as much toward the 9 hours of sleep you tended to need or want (12 would be heavenly) and to start walking more again. No matter how freezing the weather or the coldest winter in decades decreed by papers. There was a time in the summer when through a festival going on outside you ended up walking toward 25 kilometres a day and thinking nothing of it. That seemed more the norm and showed how much modern day first world people are behind through not needing to move much per day either. It was a clear illustration of how much more the body alone could achieve if you simply asked it of it. Regrettably, as said, things slid again after that, so now the need would be to wake it up more so again.
Added note or temporary conclusion after three or so days of trying to have what raw carrot you could, with the boiled broccoli, cauliflower and more carrot along with tons of sleep... Slightly less clogged. It's still very much so there, but with less pressure.
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